Watt Luck
by USMCcAnthem
Summary: Transporting to the world of FFVII? Easy. Join the military? Simple. Saving a world I know next to nothing about? Not so much. Gen. One-shot. Complete. Warnings: Adult language and humour! OC-insert Cliché! Male OC


**I.**

"Listen up recruits, and listen well!" A tall, imposing man shouted from the raised platform in front of a large crowd dressed in identical green uniforms. "As of now, you belong to this company! You don't think, you don't eat, you don't sleep, and you don't even shit without Shinra saying so! It means when I say jump there's no 'how high' bullshit, you just jump! Do you understand?"

"Sir, yes sir!" The group of fifty recruits said back.

"Not loud enough recruits!"

 **"Sir, yes sir!"** The recruits yelled, most eyes wide in fear of being punished for something so simple on the first day of training.

"You still sound like a bunch of pansies, recruits, but you can only expect so much from a bunch of girlies like yourselves!" The drill sergeant was not about to pull any punches, it seemed. "Now pick up your feet and give me fifty laps of the track! Pussy footing's over girls, time's a wasting!"

I was the first recruit to break formation and hit the track, very used to this sort of instruction from my father when he decided I needed an extra kick in the butt to get going. It was only the fact that my dad was a military officer that none of the neighbours called him in for child abuse when I was a kid, what with all the yelling and sparring he made me do. He was a hard ass and eternal military man, while my mother was a strict, unforgiving marine who spent most of her life travelling the sea while my father took care of me and acted as the drill sergeant at the local military base.

It's actually ironic where I ended up, being a recruit in Shinra's military. Truth be told, I'd made all sorts of plans when I was a kid to run away from home to get away from the demands of my parents to join the military once I hit seventeen. Of course, they had wanted me to join the Canadian Army, so at least I'd gotten that part over them. Though I doubt that either of them would believe that I'd fallen into a video game world if I ever make it back home to tell them, they would probably push it off as a hallucination and confiscate my computer and Xbox One in an attempt to keep me sane. Or control me, whichever works.

Yeah, you read that right; I fell into a video game. How? Well, let's just say when an experimental piece of technology in an out of bounds area – where you _really_ shouldn't have gone in, dare or no dare – in a military base says 'do not touch', do not proceed to drop your Pumpkin Spice Latte all over it and then try to clean in up with your Final Fantasy VII vintage t-shirt and flick a switch.

Okay, so I was an idiot, but at least I was trained to do _something_ useful in the FFVII world, unlike those weird fangirls that people keep on putting into this world that need one of the various soldiers to help them stay alive while they flail and scream. And so, with that little bit of usefulness, I sold my soul and body to Shinra Electric Power Company to become a Trooper that no one will ever remember because of the really weird helmets. I want to save this world, not die because someone remembered the birthmark under my right eye.

How was I going to save it? No idea. That vintage FFVII shirt wasn't even mine, it was my friend's, and I only knew what they had discussed (i.e. stupid fangirls putting themselves into the story and being idiots), I was more interested in games like Half-Life (old schooling it) and Left 4 Dead than JRPGs like Final Fantasy. Of course it would have to be now that my choice of hobbies would fuck me over, I could almost hear my friend Brent laughing at me now…

Oh wait, that was the painful sounding wheezing of the guy running beside me.

Anyway, the plan is that I somehow manage to stop the silver haired guy from going bonkers and trying to destroy the world, and then blow up the crazy alien thing that is in the place Cloud lives... wherever it is he lives. Everything from there is extra. I'll probably go a bit crazy and kill some people who I don't like (Brent mentioned Mad Scientists, and I've always hated Mad Scientists since that time in grade 4 with the homemade bomb one of the guys made for the science fair), but I heard that the military didn't care much for regulating mental health, so I should be okay. Probably.

"Hurry up you sissies! I don't got all day to watch you cocksuckers drag your asses!" The nostalgia that sentence makes me feel probably isn't a good thing, but it does make me pick up the pace. Really, there's nothing better than military encouragement. It sure makes you feel great about yourself at the end of the day.

 **II.**

Unsurprisingly, I had gotten through Basic without my pride damaged (not that I had much pride to begin with), near the top of the class. I swore that I could feel my parents' detached pride when I accepted the navy blue Trooper uniform and fucked up helmet to go with the shitty rifles they gave out like party favours. Thankfully, no one had decided to try and recruit me for either the Turks or SOLDIER (as I had learned the elite program was called after skimming through a newspaper and finding the silver haired guy, Sephiroth apparently, on the front page) after I showed no aptitude for a sword and being too honest for a spy during training. Which was a huge relief. Who the fuck knows what they put in those mako shots? I've managed to survive seventeen years unenhanced; I can live about another eighty more perfectly fine without it. And no, being a spy had never been on my list of things to do, and never will be.

It had actually been about a year since I had ended up in this world, Gaia, and I was no closer to somehow saving the world then I was before. But at least I was legally able to carry a weapon and kill a bunch of freaky ass monsters. (Hell Houses were a pain to get rid of, let me tell you. Never can tell where they are, and the shitty ammo that Troopers were supplied barely did anything.) Small consolation, but it's there nonetheless.

"Yo Watt! Sergeant's callin' for us," Private Hooper called from the door to the barracks, already suited up for a mission. I rolled my eyes at the last minute notification. Most of the guys didn't mind me, but all of them were constantly trying to one up me. See, when I said that I was near the top of the class, I meant it, but the thing is that everybody else that was at the top was recruited for SOLDIER or the Turks. The rest of us went for infantry. However, the gap between the top and the rest of the other recruits was so large that many of the guys were pissed that I was with them. Hooper is one of them, as he was the first person below me.

Jealousy is everywhere it seems.

"Yeah, yeah, keep your pants on," I muttered back. Efficiently strapping on my armour and putting my rifle back together. I grabbed my pack that was always ready for such occasions (I had learned after the first time something like this had happened to be ready just in case). "Well, what are we waiting for?" I asked Hooper cheerfully as I walked past him, and smiled at the poorly hidden snickers that followed me. (There's no such thing as solidarity in Shinra, it's every man for himself.) "Know what we're doing?" I asked once he caught up to me.

"Monster huntin' out in the boonies somewhere," Hooper said with a shrug. "SOLDIER commissioned a truck, man."

I nodded in understanding. Obviously the company was going to try its hand at monster hunting to get some extra cash flow, not surprising with the war with Wutai hitting its fifth year. And when a SOLDIER commissioned a truck, they would either get Troopers or Turks, depending on the severity of the mission. "Sounds like fun," I said drily. Hooper snorted in agreement, and we both were quick to go through debriefing with our unit commander – Sergeant Williams – so that we could get everything underway.

Stocking up the truck with a weeks worth of supplies, tents and first aid equipment, we were soon waiting on the SOLDIER in charge of the mission.

"I wonder if we got the General," Hooper mused, his eyes awestruck as he thought of the famous teen.

I rolled my eyes at the hero worship; even back in my own world, I never really had a hero. My father had drilled into my head that all heroes fall pretty early on, so I've never really idolized anybody, at least consciously. "If you read the paper, you'd know he's out on the front. It's probably a Second heading out; they tend to stay in Midgar more than the Firsts and Thirds." Not skilled enough to lead, but too skilled to be cannon fodder; that's life right in the middle for you.

Hooper scowled at me, "Well, not all of us spend their lives with their noses in a book." I inwardly scoffed. There's nothing wrong with being a bookworm, and LOVELESS was a marvellous play. All the way up there with my favourites: _King Lear_ and _The Importance of Being Earnest_. I never thought that I would love a drama so much, but it goes to show that you should never assume.

"Are you the troops assigned to monster hunting?" A deep voice cut into my thoughts and I turned to inspect the new arrival. The man was behemoth in human skin: tall, muscular and imposing with long spiky black hair and glowing blue eyes. The huge sword strapped casually to his back did nothing to hinder that image. He was Angeal Hewley, one of the Holy Trinity of the Shinra Army. Well, he might not be the General, but he was definitely the next best thing. Truth be told, I was rather surprised that the man had yet to be promoted to First Class.

"Yes sir," I said with a standard salute and could hear the rustle of fabric as Hooper mimicked me.

"Names," he stated politely, but it was still very much a demand. This was a man used to being listened to, not that it was a hard fact to believe considering what I knew about him.

"Private Taylor Watt," I answered easily, and then spoke for Hooper when it seemed he was unable to find his tongue, "And this is Private Ernest Hooper."

"And I'm Second Class SOLDIER Angeal Hewley, you may address me as you wish so long as it is with respect." The introduction was quick and polite, and I thanked the heavens that he didn't wish to be addressed as his full title, like some of the Third Class SOLDIERs I had worked with demanded. "Well then Privates, if you're all set, let's head on out," he ordered and we were quick to get into the truck, both of us sitting in front while Hewley sprawled out in the back with his huge sword resting beside him. It was only as he was sitting that I realized that he also carried a standard issue broadsword on him, and I wondered at that. The huge sword was a two hander from what little I knew about swords, so why would he need two?

(I later learned that he never used the larger sword he carried, but I guess that if you're that good, you can chose to be eccentric.)

The trip to our rather forgettable destination in the middle of nowhere was boring and long, with only a couple stops made for a drink, piss and snack (not precisely in that order). Thankfully I was able to read LOVELESS when it wasn't my turn to drive, so the time did pass relatively quickly. However, it was the mission itself that was rather boring. When I mentioned that Hewley should be promoted to First Class, I wasn't kidding, and his skill showed when taking down the various monsters that Hooper and I harvested for items and monster parts that people were interested in buying. Even with a crappy sword the man was masterful of every move he made.

However amazing it was to watch a master at work, it was time for us to pitch up camp. I looked over to Hooper and we did a quick game of 'Rock, Paper, Scissors' before he won and headed back to the truck to set up camp. After all, it's way more fun to play with fire materia to start a fire then it was to be up to your elbows in monster guts. I grimaced at the Hippogriff and silently apologized to Buckbeak before continuing on my task. There was no need to be sentimental over monsters; it just made you fucked up in the head like Private Sanders. He never recovered from his episode with the Malboro. No one was quite brave enough to ask what happened to know how to help, but I bet it had something to do with tentacles if the way he reacts to the meatloaf surprise in the infantry cafeteria is any indication.

Ugh, bad idea to think about meatloaf surprise when dealing with Hippogriff intestines.

Coughing in an attempt to stop myself from barfing, I looked away from the monster carcass to look over at Hewley and my eyes widened in fear. I was quick to tear off the long gloves made especially for harvesting monsters on the field and grabbed my rifle. Flipping the safety off, I quickly aimed and released fire on the very monster I had been thinking about earlier. It had somehow managed to sneak up behind Hewley as he fought off another Hippogriff.

The Malboro shrieked enraged as I went about hitting every single vital point on a Malboro that I could remember. The eyes were hit with the precision my father had made sure to breed into me before I turned twelve and I had honed since, while some bullets tore apart the various tentacles that sprouted from its grotesque body. Thankfully before it could think about moving toward me, Angeal finished off the Hippogriff and started to attack the Malboro in earnest. With his help, the monster was down in no time flat, and I was left panting as the adrenaline left my system. It was only due to my helmet and regulated scarf that I didn't have any monster bits on my face, otherwise I wouldn't have been unable to push down the need to vomit as the after shock of nearly dying overwhelmed me.

"Well, that's enough monster hunting for me today," Hewley said wryly as he looked down at the severely chopped up Malboro. "Are you alright Private Watt?"

I nodded automatically. "Yes sir, I'm fine, just a bit shaken is all."

"Well, you have my thanks Private," Hewley said gravely, looking at me intensely with his glowing blue eyes. "I would've injured without your assistance."

"I'm just doing my job, sir," I stated firmly as my hands finally stopped shaking enough for me to flip the safety back on without accidentally dropping my rifle to the ground. That's just asking for it to jam.

"All the same," he said and sighed as he looked back to the Hippogriff. "We best finish harvesting these two before we head back, or we'll just attract even more monsters."

"Yes sir," I replied as my body went through the soothing motions of routine, even if my movements were a bit jerky every so often. With Hewley's help, the work was done efficiently, and the monsters bodies dissolved into mako particles. (It's a well-known fact that monsters will disappear after one to two hours, twelve if you're dealing with a Zolom or Dragon, but anything you harvest from them will stay for as long as you need it.) Then we were heading back to the truck where Hooper had set up camp. Hewley apparently felt that my fellow Trooper had shown no 'honour' in not coming to assist us when he heard gunfire and went into a rather long rant about justice, honour and morality.

It rather reminded me of the long conversations my mother and father would get into whenever he talked about her decision to stay in the marines after I had been born. Though it involved a lot less talking back, as I'm pretty sure that Hooper felt like an ant about to be stepped on.

After that day though, Hewley (who later insisted on me calling him by his first name) was rather cordial with me. It seems that the best way to get close to him is help save his life, who knew? However, now that we seemed to be friends of a sort, he insisted on talking to me on the way back to Midgar, which means that I couldn't read my beloved LOVELESS.

"Taylor," yes he had also begun to call me by my own first name after asking for permission, "Have you ever used a sword?"

I nodded in confirmation, a grimace on my lips as I remembered the day we had to try using swords in basic. "We had to try near the end of basic, but I did rather poorly."

Angeal nodded thoughtfully, "That's probably why you weren't considered for SOLDIER. We do prioritize sword usage."

I barely stopped myself from snorting at the double entendre, ah the joys of being a pervert.

"And having a SOLDIER who nearly skewered another recruit the moment they picked up a sword isn't exactly comforting," I stated drily and Hooper winced from beside me. His friend was the one I nearly skewered.

Angeal chuckled lightly, "Yes, that would be rather bad for PR."

"Why'd you ask?"

"Oh, I was just wondering if you wanted to spar sometime." Do not laugh Taylor; do not laugh. Not everyone understands your perverted humour.

"It's rather hard to spar with guns, and me being unenhanced doesn't exactly lead to unarmed combat being fair." Hooper coughed, and I bet he was trying not to laugh at the ridiculous image of me facing off against Angeal. I'm not a small person myself, at 6'1" and a lifetime of being pushed to my limits I was quite muscular as well, but I looked puny compared to Angeal.

"It would be rather unfair, but I do think that it would be fun to teach you how to fight with a sword," he said determined.

"Only if you don't mind working with a hopeless case," I agreed after a moment of thought. If nothing else it would be neat. It _had_ been rather disappointing to learn that I was so naturally bad at swords.

"For a friend? No, I don't mind." Well, way to go and make me feel warm and fuzzy. I'm a man, dammit, and I wasn't supposed to feel warm and fuzzy without kittens or puppies involved! Sheesh.

 **III.**

It had been three months since meeting Angeal, and surprisingly, I could now swing a sword without accidentally decapitating anyone, though doing it on purpose was still a bit iffy. I had some finesse… kind of. Well, I wasn't SOLDIER level, but I was getting somewhere close to competent, which was really going to help me here. Here being on the Wutai front, where every warrior carries two swords and occasionally demands their opponents to fight them with a sword and be honorable. I don't understand how giving a man who has never trained with a sword properly and demanding he fight with it when you're a master swordsman is honorable, but I'm only paid to shoot where I'm pointed to, not explore the psychological states of the enemy.

(Killing another person was hard enough when you didn't understand them or their culture, let alone when you can sympathize with them. There is a reason why soldiers back home, and here as well, hate senselessly. It makes it that much easier to pull the trigger and not feel guilty at the end of the day. It's not right, but nothing about war is easy, and sometimes you just need to sleep at night without being plagued by nightmares.)

"You there! Trooper!" The loud voice of Commander Genesis Rhapsodos called across the camp. The red haired man was a very good Commander, caring about his troops despite his callous attitude, but he was dramatic as all get out once he was off the front. However, I forgave most of his faults because the guy could quote LOVELESS from memory, and I'd always been impressed with people who could do that.

I raised an eyebrow in question as I realized it was me he was pointing at. "Yes Commander?"

"What is an uneducated heathen like yourself doing pretending to read LOVELESS?" He demanded and trying to swipe my book from me once he got close enough, but I held it close to my chest and frowned.

"First of all, I am not uneducated, no matter what my records say," I stated in annoyance. I'd worked hard for my intelligence, and had been working my way towards a full scholarship to the school of my choice (far, far away from my parents) when I decided to be an idiot and destroy an untested machine. "Second of all, this is my favourite play, and could you please stop trying to take it from me?" I said snappishly as I danced away from his grasping hands.

"No mere infantry grunt could understand the beauties of LOVELESS. _My friend, the fates are cruel."_ He swooned dramatically, but his eyes were sharp.

"Act four."

He blinked before looking at me incredulously.

"Act four, that's where that line's from," I repeated. "I may not have the greatest memory to be able to recite every line, but I've read the play at least twelve times by now, so it goes to show that I would know which line belongs where."

" _There is no hate, only joy,_ " he said with a smile curling at his lips. "First Class SOLDIER Commander Genesis Rhapsodos, a pleasure to meet you."

I let myself smirk as I finished my favourite line of the play and the only one I had managed to memorize, _"For you are beloved by the Goddess._ A pleasure to meet you properly as well, Commander. I'm Corporal Taylor Watt." I'd been promoted after Angeal had given me a recommendation for our mission together.

His face lit up in realization as he snapped his fingers, "Ah, you're the one Angeal was telling me about! _Infinite in mystery is the gift of the Goddess."_

Oh gosh, he tells his friends about me. Not a bad thing, but well, considering how horrible I am with a sword, this could be embarrassing. "Yes…"

And that was how I somehow managed to become friends with another SOLDIER. If I somehow meet Sephiroth in a similar manner, I'm liable to shoot myself.

 **IV.**

I think I have some of the weirdest luck out there. I mean, it's not as if finding myself in the Final Fantasy VII world wasn't bad enough, but making friends with two of the most famous SOLDIERs of the program? And then doing something as mundane as going out drinking with them, only for us to drunkenly (or them, as I'd only had one beer to their twenty) stumble upon a Church in Sector 5 when not five minutes ago we were in Sector 3. Maybe I'm drunker then I thought I was.

"Oh, hello," the young, preteen girl greeted us in surprise as we stumbled into the church.

"Hello!" Angeal returned loudly as he sauntered over to a pew and collapsed upon the damaged wood.

" _The wandering soul knows no rest,"_ Genesis mumbled as he leaned over his large friend and shook him. However, it seemed that Angeal had knocked himself out, as all it did was settle him more comfortably on the pew.

"Nice to meet you," I said in greeting as she giggled at my friends antics. However, her eyes, like many below the plate were wary at the sight of the two SOLDIERs. "My name's Taylor and these two drunkards are Angeal and Genesis."

"'M not drunk," Genesis disagreed. "Now stop spinnin' so I can yell at you. _Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul."_

"Now you're not even making sense," I looked at him warily as he sloppily sneered.

The girl giggled a little more openly and offered me a hand to shake, which I took, surprised at her firm grip. "I'm Aerith, nice to meet you."

Genesis, ever the charmer, swaggered over to Aerith and grabbed her hands and kissed her knuckles, not noticing that she stiffened at the touch. "Pleasure, milady."

"Are you alright, Miss?" I asked concerned when she remained stiff, her brilliant green eyes glazing over, as if seeing something none of us were able to. Heck, maybe she could. It's not like I knew much of anything about FFVII to say otherwise.

"Fine, I'm fine," she stuttered out as she gazed intently upon my two friends, looking much older than her appearance suggested. However, as she cast me a glance, her features became much younger as she hesitated. "Um, well, would you mind if I borrow your friends to do something? It should be harmless!" The last part was said hurriedly as I frowned in thought.

"Well…" I trailed off as I looked at the two stupidly drunk SOLDIERs. I probably shouldn't agree out of principle, but if anyone asks me later, I'll just say that I was drunk. People always forgive drunks for stupid shit… mostly. "So long as it doesn't hurt them, I don't want anything bad to happen."

"If anything, this should help them," she said cheerily, as her naturally happy disposition shown through.

"Alright then," I agreed and helped her move the two men over to the fountain in the back of the church, only taking a moment to marvel at the fact that there were flowers growing below the surface. That takes some skill to accomplish, or maybe just magic. If Angeal weren't passed out he'd probably be firing off question after question at the girl to find out how; he's a bit obsessive when it comes to plants, like Genesis and I are over LOVELESS.

Once I had the two SOLDIERs laying side by side, Angeal passed out while Genesis was giggling and repeating Act II of LOVELESS under his breath, Aerith knelt beside the fountain. Her hands and eyes glowed a bright green as some of the water lifted up from the fountain and coated the two men on the ground. Genesis gasped as his eyes shot open wide before they fell closed, as though he had been put to sleep. Angeal didn't move so much as completely and totally relax, his body seeming to sink boneless into the floor of the church. I watched hopelessly as the water moved all over their bodies while Aerith rested her green-coated hands on their foreheads.

I have no idea how long it took for her to finish, but once she did, she swayed forward, and it was only my quick reflexes that stopped her from falling on top of my friends. "Are you okay?" I asked quickly. "Are they okay?"

She sighed softly as she pressed the palm of her right hand against her forehead and massaged it, as if boding off a headache. "They should be fine, better than fine," she assured quietly. "And I'll be better after a good night's sleep. It just took a lot out of me."

"Well, I have no idea what it was you did, but thank you," I said kindly as I helped her up to her feet. If nothing else, she had managed to make them relax, which was a luxury they hadn't had since being sent out onto the war front.

"No, thank you," she smiled at me, once again with old eyes looking out from a young face. "The Planet blesses you, for you've done as you were asked to."

I blinked stupidly for a moment, before deciding that nodding was the best option in this situation. She giggled at my expression and skipped out of the church with a bubbly goodbye tossed over her shoulder.

Once she was gone, I looked at the two sleeping men and groaned. How the heck was I going to get them back to their rooms now?

Damn my luck.

 **V.**

"Recruits Fair and Sinclair?" I called to the two troublemakers of new recruits huddled over a box. Two months ago I had been quickly promoted to Sergeant after the death of my unit's commander. As I was the only one who had shown any aptitude towards leading despite only being in the army for two years, it was decided that my unit would be placed under a more experienced commander until I gained experience by training recruits. It all seemed rather redundant, as why promote me as a replacement only to put someone else in the spot you promoted me to have? That's just fucked up.

However, some good came out of it, and it wasn't just the increased pay. I now knew why my dad was so obsessed with acting like an ass during training; it is both fun and stress relieving.

"Sir!" They both snapped off a salute, Recruit Sinclair showing nothing but the lazy charm he always exuded, but Recruit Fair was rather nervous.

"At ease," I responded with a quirk of my lips. "And Recruit Fair, if you continue to act as nervous as you are, people will think you're up to something."

The tall, dark haired teen laughed awkwardly and scratched the back of his head, "Ha ha, thanks for the tip."

"Are you going to tell on us, yo?" Sinclair asked, his long red hair momentarily shadowing his eyes threateningly before he relaxed into his usual languid posture.

"Hmm…" I hummed as I eyed the two speculatively. Recruit Sinclair eyed me, calculating, and I knew exactly why the Turks were looking at him. With his wiry build, laidback attitude and the ability to cover up his emotions, he'd do very well. Of course, they'd recruit him for sure if he managed to get the loudest recruit to finish a secretive mission with him. "I'll let you both go…" I trailed off and smirked fully as Recruit Fair sagged in relief only to stiffen as I continued, "if you're willing to do an unorthodox mission for me." Of course, I was very willing to help push things forward. Not that the Turks weren't pushing me in that direction anyway.

Recruit Sinclair narrowed his eyes in thought before sharing a look with Fair. The other nodded and they looked at me seriously.

"Good to know you're on board. Come, follow me to my office," I ushered them after me to the small office I had been given upon my promotion. It could just barely fit me, the desk, Angeal and Genesis when they visited, so it was no surprise that the two teens were able to squeeze in easily. "Now, I was planning on doing this myself, but I think that both of you will benefit from this." I was lying about doing it myself, but it doesn't matter. I grabbed the two wrapped boxes of chocolate out of one of my drawers and placed them on my desk.

"What?" Recruit Fair asked incredulously, but stopped talking once Sinclair nudged him in the ribs.

"These two boxes are for Professors Hollander and Hojo of the science department. Chocolate to be more exact," I smirked at the choked expressions the two had. "Yes, this was a bet from my two best friends." Another lie. They'd gotten the chocolate from the Turks and then they gave it to me. An hour after I got the boxes, a little slip of paper arrived on my desk informing me of my options. I'd decided to pick the one that would benefit everybody. "However, they never specified how I had to get these boxes of chocolate to them. So… if you complete this, then I'll put in a good word for both of the programs you're entered into."

They both hummed and hawed before agreeing, taking the boxes of chocolates from me before vanishing to go plan.

Five days later ten different floors had mysterious things happen to them: they turned different colours, random farm animals roamed the halls, all the paperwork was replaced with crappy romance novels and, on one memorable floor, being flooded by purple bubbles. Recruits Fair and Sinclair showed up in my office right after the end of the day and gave an official report citing who did what (unsurprisingly, Fair was the one to come up with the bubbles) and how they managed to sneak the chocolates onto the desks of the two Professors. Bright distractions were apparently very good at getting the two intelligent men out of their offices (on different floors), as they liked to point and laugh (discretely) at the idiots in the other departments.

Not long after, Shinra held two funerals for the recently deceased Professors, who had apparently been poisoned. When I'd initially heard the news, I had cackled for an hour straight in the relative safety of my office before Tseng of the Turks arrived. They interviewed me for an hour about what I knew – I didn't lie, as they'd probably kill me, revive me and then kill me again if I did – before sending me on my way. The little smirk on Tseng's face would amuse me for the rest of the month.

Not soon after they had died, a new Head to the Science Department was hired and they 'found' the procedures for mako transfusions that the SOLDIERs received; the ones that Hojo said were never written down… Genesis collapsed from laughter in the middle of the hallway when he learned of it, not that I was far behind him. And with the mako transfusions going on as usual, the new set of SOLDIER cadets were added to the program, one Zack Fair a part of the crowd, while Reno Sinclair disappeared into the Turks.

Truly, I see no loss in the entire set up. Now if only I could kill Heidegger, then my life would be complete.

 **VI.**

I was going to kill something if Zack didn't stop snickering so hard. And Angeal wasn't helping at all.

"If you keep shivering that hard, you'll fall apart," Angeal said casually.

I glared at him, "Well excuse me for being unenhanced." I muttered various insults about mako and his size and ignored the way he coughed to hide his own laughter. I knew he could hear me, but I wasn't charitable enough at that moment to keep my insults in my head.

"You're excused," he joked, but his smile turned to a frown when another shiver wracked my body. I had been used to temperatures like this once upon a time, but being in Midgar and, later, Wutai had undoubtedly spoiled me. "Come here," he beckoned me, and I quickly shuffled under his arm, praying that no one would ever find out that I had cuddled him. All of my co-workers already thought I was sleeping with one of my SOLDIER friends, no need to add ammo to the rumour. "Better?"

"Yeah," I answered truthfully. The larger man was like a furnace and feeling was beginning to flow back into my body. "Never mention this to anyone, ever," I said to Private Cloud Strife behind me, who was perfectly fine despite the cold. Damn local.

"Of course, sir," he said with a playful smile. The little blond had been under my wing since he'd been a recruit, as my unit had perished a week before the end of the war in combat under the 'experienced' sergeant they had put in my place while I was gaining more 'practical knowledge' (it helped that I was damned good at my job). He'd been the runt of the litter, but he had a stubborn streak a mile wide and just as long with the drive to improve and _never stop_ improving. Truthfully, all I'd needed to do was give him a little attention and introduce him to Zack and the kid had flourished like you wouldn't believe. Unfortunately he had just barely failed the SOLDIER exam test (which had actually gotten harder, in order to lower the amount of SOLDIERs because of the budget cuts after the war) so he was stuck in the regular army until next year when he could retake the test.

"Aw but Boss Man, it would be the talk of Shinra for at least a week," Zack complained as swung an arm around Cloud who scowled at the teen, but didn't shrug it away.

"Yes, and that is exactly why I'm asking you not to say anything," I glared at him, not that he could see it behind my helmet. "I may be your technical inferior in rank, but I can still order you to do suicides for hours if I like."

"Bu-but!" Zack spluttered as he remembered the one week of endless suicides that the recruits of his cycle had needed to do when one too many had back talked to me. "You can't do that!"

I just smirked and turned to face forward. We were nearly at the Mako Reactor that resided in Nibelheim and I wanted to be ready for anything that would jump out of us. After all, if I remembered correctly, this was where the alien thing was stored. And it wouldn't do to become complacent and somehow die when I _know_ it might be dangerous.

"Be quiet puppy," Angeal chided his apprentice. "There is no honour in complaining against a deserving punishment."

Zack made some noises of discontent, but quieted when Cloud slapped him upside the head. "Stuff it jungle boy."

"Don't you jungle boy me, Mountain hick," Zack shot back.

"Idiot."

"Simpleton."

"Simpleton?" Cloud asked incredulously. "Since when do you know a word like that, you louse?"

"I'll have you know that I _do_ read," Zack sniffed pretentiously and I had to stifle a snort. "And really? Louse?"

"I personally think it was a good descriptor," Cloud said back stiffly, and it was quiet for a moment before both broke out laughing.

Angeal and I sighed in exasperation – and in unison, because we spent way too much time together teaching those two idiots – before breaking apart and dragging our respective apprentices off in different directions to the reactor. It was standard procedure for this type of thing, and Cloud and I were more than strong enough to deal with a couple Dorky Faces, and even a pack of Nibelheim wolves would be hard pressed to take us down. Not that I'm bragging or anything.

…Right.

We trooped through the metal and concrete structure, checking all rooms and pipes for any leaks or easily spotted malfunctions. Despite knowing that there was an alien resting in the reactor, I treated the entire thing as standard procedure. Truthfully, looking on the surface, you would never guessthat there was a creepy ass alien in here. Which was probably the point, really.

"Sir, I think I found something…" Cloud's voice called from behind me, and I exited the room I had been checking to stand behind him.

I blinked rapidly for a moment as I stared at the tank full of mako housing what could possibly be a female body. "Huh… That looks fucked up." I had been expecting it, but not. It was much, much worse looking in person.

The young trooper snort and shook his head, "That's one way to describe it, Sergeant."

"Well, look at the holes for arms that she has!" I tried to defend myself, "And the tentacle sticking out of her stomach! And yet, despite all the freaky decaying of her body, her hair is still silky smooth."

"I'll be sure to recommend, er, _it_ to Shinra Shampoo for their next commercial," Cloud drawled out drily and I rolled my eyes behind my helmet.

"Why'd I have to pick such a sassy recruit to mentor?" I asked rhetorically as I went about draining the tank of mako. Cloud had his rifle pointed directly at the alien, whose eyes had opened to shine a bright – and seriously freaky – red.

"Because I'm amazing," he deadpanned, though his voice shook minutely. I chuckled quietly and flipped the last switch on the panel nearby, the drains opening in the bottom of the tank and quickly removing all of the poisonous liquid.

We both winced at the high-pitched screech that sounded in our heads as the alien fell to the bottom of the tank with nothing to hold it up. "Fuck, Private, shoot on three." I readied my rifle and said quickly, "Three."

 _Bang bang bang!_

The shoots were quick to break apart the glass and slam into the (dead?) deformed body. It was quick to fall apart, though that might have to do with the large amount of lead now resting in its body. However, I was not about to pull any punches, especially since the thing was still yelling in my head, and lowered my rifle to ready my materia. The Fire materia I kept on me at all times glowed and I was able to throw the fireball that appeared at the monster. (I suddenly thanked all those hours spent with Genesis learning how to use materia. That had been the longest two months of my life, and I still couldn't go above the first tier of spells due to my poor mana pool. One of the downsides of being from Earth, I guessed. I just counted myself lucky to have mana at all.)

As the fire turned the body to ashes, the screaming dimmed until it no longer sounded at all.

It was as the being was silenced, did I notice that a larger figure was holding me up. And they seemed to be asking me a question.

"-lor! Can you hear me?" I heard the tail end of the question and blinked rapidly, realizing that my helmet had been removed with my noticing.

"…Yeah," I finally answered as I gained my bearings. Zack and Cloud were near the door, with the Private leaning against his tall friend. Angeal was holding me from behind a little a ways from the new pile of ash that was situated on the floor. "Shit…"

Angeal gave a choked laughed as he tightened his arms around me for a moment before letting me go, "You would say that." He let me gain my balance on my own before questioning, "Just what was that?"

"Alien," I said quietly, looking at the three men seriously.

"Well, it certainly wasn't natural," Cloud added drily.

"Why did you have the fun part of the mission?" Zack whined after a moment of silence. "That's what SOLDIERs are for. Ow!" He rubbed his ribs from where Cloud had elbowed him and pouted at his young friend. "What was that for?"

"What do you think that was for?"

"I don't know, that's why I asked."

Angeal and I laughed at the normalcy of the two play fighting, and soon we were leaving the reactor. None of us wanted to linger in that place now that we knew something fucked had been stored inside. I think we all wanted to go home and pretend this had never happened right at that moment, but unfortunately that wasn't possible.

We trooped down the mountain like the good little soldiers we were and bunked in the town's inn for the rest of the night (which ended up in a bit of a spectacle when Cloud took off his helmet and the locals started to harass him), before we went back up to inspect the Shinra Mansion that resided in this backwater town.

The place was crawling in monsters, and I thanked the Goddess that I had brought extra ammo and the broadsword that I had been practicing with whenever Angeal managed to convince me it was a good idea. Otherwise I would've dead at least ten times over. And I rather like being alive, thanks.

Eventually we came upon the library (and the secret door _in_ the library) and Cloud and I went about reading some of the books that were scattered about. Most of them were complete baloney and I had to wonder if whoever decided to compile this library was high at the time. The writing was so full of errors and was so windy it would be amazing if anybody ever got any information out of _any_ of the books.

Time passed quickly as Cloud and I systematically burned and destroyed the books, both of us relishing in the chance to use more materia before the other two came back. (It is well known that every trooper enjoys a good bonfire, but I'm convinced that everyone was a pyromaniac somehow.) However, they came back with one extra.

"Are you a vampire? I'm pretty sure you're a vampire 'cuz you're so pale and were sleeping in a coffin. Can I call you Vlad? I think it would fit, don't you?" Zack rambled to the stranger whose face seemed to be carved from marble.

"Zack, vampires don't exist," Cloud drawled slowly, before turning a polite smile to the new. "Nice to meet you sir, I'm Private Cloud Strife."

"Vincent," the man said in a deep voice that shocked me. He was androgynous, especially with the long hair, so I kind of expected him to have a higher voice.

"I'm Sergeant Taylor Watt," I greeted when those red eyes turned to me. He seemed familiar, and I guess he was apart of the game somehow, like Zack, Cloud, Genesis and Angeal were. The man inclined his head politely, and I gathered rather quickly that he wasn't one to talk much. "So is that all?" I asked Angeal.

"Yes, we're free to leave now. I'm certain we got rid of all the excess here." By excess, he meant experiments and monsters. I wasn't at all surprised that there were more in the secret tunnel, not with our little find in the mako reactor.

I nodded quickly and pulled out my PHS to call Reno, who was the Turk in charge of our transport, and quickly informed him of the situation. I wanted to get out of here as soon as possible so that I can go to my Shinra provided room and take a lukewarm shower before falling asleep on my lumpy bunk.

I had done everything that I had set out to do, now I could relax for a couple of hours before training my apprentice into the ground so that he's ready for his exams.

Zack grinned and connected his hands behind his head, sauntering over to the door, "With that over, let's mosey!"

 _~THE END~_

* * *

 **TIMELINE:**

 _1979 –_ Genesis Rhapsodos is born.

 _1980 –_ Angeal Hewley and Sephiroth are born. Taylor calculates this to be his year of birth.

 _1984 –_ Zack Fair is born.

 _1985 –_ Aerith Gainsborough is born, February 7th.

 _1986 –_ Cloud Strife is born August 11th.

 _1990 –_ Sephiroth officially joins the SOLDIER program.

 _1992 –_ The Wutai war begins. Sephiroth promoted to SOLDIER First Class. Used as a propaganda tool to increase Shinra's military power.

 _1994 –_ Genesis and Angeal join Shinra.

 _1996 –_ Taylor Watt wakes up in the outskirts of Midgar and joins Shinra.

 _1997 –_ Angeal and Taylor go on their mission together. Three months later Genesis and Taylor are sent to the front lines. Angeal, Genesis and Taylor meet Aerith.

 _1998 –_ Zack joins Shinra. Taylor enlists Zack and Reno to give Hojo and Hollander poisoned chocolates. Hojo and Hollander die.

 _0000 –_ Cloud joins Shinra. Taylor mentors him.

 _0001 –_ Wutai War ends with a big showing of the Holy Trinity. Shinra allowed to build Mako Reactors in Wutai.

 _0002 –_ Angeal, Zack, Taylor and Cloud go on the Nibelheim Mission. Jenova destroyed.

* * *

 **A/N:**

After recently starting to play FFVII, I decided to see if I could make a long one-shot and _keep_ it a one-shot (which I've tried about five times before and never managed, though none have been published anywhere). Obviously, I managed it. I had fun writing it as well, so I think that overall this ended up quite good, especially since I managed to get everything I wanted into it. Funnily enough, when I started this, Taylor was female and dating Angeal, which is why I have hints of them being gay together, it's more of a personal joke than anything. However, I know that I did a horrible characterization of everybody, so I apologize. (I haven't played much of the game, let alone it's spin offs, to know much about their characters.)

Anyway, thanks for reading this and I hope it wasn't too painful for you FFVII lovers out there.

Cheers,  
USMCcAnthem


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